idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize