Sry I called you an 8
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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