great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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