he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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