So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
