at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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