Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
operation have a gay friend backfired
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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