Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
