Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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