The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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