You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize