I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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