i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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