I'm going to jail i love you
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize