I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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