I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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