i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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