My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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