Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
