How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
