they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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