Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
