And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
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