He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Randomize
