If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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