i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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