So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
