I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
