She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Welp...herpes.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
