Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
