I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
