how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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