Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
