I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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