apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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