He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
