Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
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