so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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