You're a womanizer and a bitch.
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
