what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
