You're my little dorito
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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