have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
