is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
