Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
You are a genius and a whore.
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