mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
How naked do you want me to be?
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