I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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