You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
we're so committed to being not committed
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
