i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
