I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Randomize
