Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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