I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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