yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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