I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize